In the How to Play section of Dexterity’s manual SNK calls this a “jigsaw puzzle, maze, and labyrinth game“. That’s a pretty unhelpful description, so I’ll give you mine: Dexterity is a Fucker Game. For the unfamiliar, FUCKER GAME, DEFINED: “a game that involuntarily makes you call it a Fucker frequently and with increasing intensity.” Alumni of Fucker Game University are not necessarily bad, but they are typically frustrating, obnoxious, or both. Dexterity just happens to be all of the above! FGU! FGU!
I would love to tell you what Dexterity is about, but SNK didn’t manage to figure that out before manufacturing the cart labels. In Japan it was called “Funny Field” which still doesn’t explain why this little boy is trapped in a series of increasingly horrible grids. The manual’s story page ends on “So find the magical key to unlock the door to not only Dexter’s but your own wonderful imagination!”. I tried, but a beetle sat on the key until I died of exposure.
The goal of the game is to flip all the floor tiles to their other color before the timer runs out. This works similarly to Reversi, by which I mean if you flip a tile and there’s another flipped tile in the same row or column, it’ll flip every tile in-between to the same color. Please don’t get the impression that this is a cerebral, abstract affair. The game’s called Dexterity, y’know? It isn’t as much of a puzzle game as it is a real time scramble with enemies that’ll unflip your tiles, forcing you to double back to fix them. At first this is fairly simple to the point of being a bit dull, but eventually the stages transition to a particularly shitty maze game filled with enemies that hate the board, hate you, but most of all, hate predictable behavior.
Games like this always involve variance but Dexterity’s luck factor is way out of whack. Enemies may or may not bother to flip tiles in any given direction or at any given time. Their movement styles are predictable in that some are slow, some are fast, some tend to turn, etc., but what they actually do is known only to them and god. If I voiced my opinion of that goddamn snowman I would get in trouble. This is exacerbated by the powerups. These range from giving you a few worthless points to all but winning you the level, but what you get is mostly random as far as I can tell, beyond the good ones being rarer. Because of course they are. Most of the time you’re playing from behind, trying to play Reversi uphill despite Wesley Snipes’ warnings, but it’s just as unsatisfying when the game occasionally just throws you a win for free!
I was so convinced that this game was fucking with me that I swapped to a save state-capable device and started testing. Some of the enemies pretty much always do the same thing, and you can semi-reliably route some sections, but as I reran annoying levels again and again I noticed irregularities. Sometimes the enemies did practically nothing, other times they would go so far as to hold chokepoints and just refuse to move, wasting upwards of 10 seconds or getting me killed outright. Success isn’t earned in Dexterity, it’s eventually granted.
Even the bonus game is borderline random! At first it looks like it’s just a memorization challenge, flashing a bunch of tiles on an otherwise empty board that you need to remember and flip, except one of them is secretly a skull that’ll kick you out with no extra life to your name. I think these patterns are preset and if you memorize the placements you’ll be able to 100% them, but that’s a level of time-sadism I simply do not possess, says the guy who’s playing all of these.
By the time you managed to hold onto your continues long enough to get to the end you’re confronted by King Tojo, a bigass ghost boss who’s basically from a different video game with mechanics to match. The fight involves picking up and throwing enemies, a mechanic that doesn’t exist until then, meaning if you don’t immediately get the hang of it and successfully land the dozen or however many hits Tojo demands there’s a very real chance you have to play the entire video game over again. Did you know this game’s Nintendo-assigned designation is DMG-FU-USA? You cannot make this shit up! They know what they did!
I like the jaunty little tunes. I guess. Half a point for those. Fucker.
Wack Game Boy Zone 