wack game boy zone. there's a small doodle of a game boy above zone

Tag: mario

  • Super Mario Land (1989)

    Super Mario Land (1989)

    As I’ve been plugging away at the Game Boy’s launch titles I’ve been hemming and hawing on when to talk about Super Mario Land. It seems like one of those games that I should cover with intent, you know? It’s got The Guy on it! The funny Italian one! So I waited. Then I thought about it some more and like…I think there’s enough Mario to be had on this system? We can do this now. It’s fine.

    The Yokoi-led R&D1 division designed this game specifically for the system’s launch, opting to not simply port the NES games in favor of making something wholly new, and boy can you tell! The moment to moment feel of movement is pretty Mario-ish, but everything else is jarringly different. Fireballs? No, superballs that ricochet at angles that’d make your geometry teacher blush! Enemies aplenty that have barely returned beyond the backgrounds of games like Mario Kart World: Moai, Jiangshi, giant flies that turn into horrible skeletons on death that just…linger, and my new favorite: Pipe That Just Has A Fist In It. You get dropped off in later worlds by an unexplained UFO? Picking up a star plays the Can-Can for some reason? There are side scrolling shmup sections??? This Mario guy needs to calm the hell down, he’s gonna overstimulate the soon-to-be-90’s kids!

    All of these choices coalesce into a play experience that feels…weird. You ever play a bootleg that was simultaneously flagrantly incorrect but well made on a technical level? I have, and this would certainly qualify for the list if it was lacking the Nintendo seal. The differences chafed at first. My muscle memory betrayed me semi-regularly, I couldn’t hit a rubber ball shot to save my life, all the sound effects being off kept throwing me for a loop, and…it’s really small? Like everything is tiny. I remember playing this as a kid on a friend’s GB, and even then I remember thinking “oof, ow, my eyes” before handing it back. It doesn’t help that I’d already played the sequel by that point, but that’s a comparison for another day!

    Eventually I acclimated, played the game on its own terms, and took some time to think after beating it a couple times, which is less impressive than it sounds considering this consists of a whole 4 levels. A lot of thought has gone into the following opinion, so I’d appreciate if you treat it with the respect it deserves, OK? Here goes:

    Mario Land is…good.

    Good! Not great, but good. Weird, but I’d argue not weird enough, especially given the reputation it’s built over the years as “the odd one”. Plenty enjoyable in the moment, but so bite sized that it feels more like a tech demo than a full first-party release, which is honestly apt given the circumstances of its development. There’s also a little bit of discomfort in the last world, which opens with the auditory equivalent of Wonton font before transitioning into my favorite track of what ends up being a fairly punchy OST overall. It’s solid enough head to tail, but nothing about it really stands out beyond the areas where it most significantly diverges from established series convention. The whole thing is just a bit wonky.

    Yet, this wonkiness is core to what makes Super Mario Land such an ideal launch title for the handheld. Sure it’s not a better game than home console Marios, and frankly I don’t think anyone reasonable would’ve expected it to be, but it was built from top to bottom to provide the exact experience Yokoi and team intended for the Game Boy on launch: short play sessions of games designed specifically for its play conditions. How long did you really want to stare at the DMG’s pea soup screen? Just long enough to beat SML again, probably! Playing this on better hardware almost betrays the game design a bit, highlighting seams that were less apparent at the time. I don’t love SML, but I do respect the design chops on display greatly. You’re not my favorite launch title, Mr. Land, but you’ve left me with even more respect for Nintendo’s funny little brick as well as the minds behind it, and I appreciate that!

    3/5

  • Tennis (1989)

    Tennis (1989)

    “Mario” Tennis? We’ve already got that game at home! See, there’s Mario! He’s the one who keeps telling you how bad you are at serving!

    Consider that this was a Game Boy launch title, on a system that was a lot of people’s first exposure to Nintendo and its roster of marketable mascots. I would love to meet the person whose response to “Hey, do you like Mario?” would be “Who, the Tennis judge?”. He’s so out of place too, just sittin’ there watching completely normal dudes whack the ball around, surrounded by an audience of more normal dudes. If it wasn’t for the cutaways to his smiling face every time you foul, I’d have thought it was just an overt easter egg or something, but no! They want you to know that Mario is Here. Watching. Waiting.

    Beyond the ever present plumber, yeah this sure is a Tennis game. A hits fast but risks clipping the net, B lobs and travels slower. Your dpad input influences your shots and gives you a surprising amount of control, and it doesn’t do you the kindness of Mario Tennis when it comes to hitting the ball well outside of the lines. I initially chafed at Mario constantly telling me that the very-obviously-on-the-line balls weren’t, but grew to appreciate the amount of finesse this game’s hitting has. Makes for good multiplayer too!

    Where I have some gripes is the character movement. It, uh, sucks. You’re slow as hell, there’s no lunges or dives or anything, only waddle around and smack. It makes playing the net feel incredibly risky as you can position the ball better, but any wide lob will kill you dead without recourse. The game has 4 levels of difficulty as well, each making your opponent faster and boosting the ball speed, meaning the game becomes entirely about positioning.

    Actually, let’s talk about that speed for a second. Tennis goes fast as hell by levels 3 and 4. Where was this in Baseball? That game felt like you were playing in the vacuum of space, meanwhile Tennis had me gripping my GB a little too tightly as I rocked the pad back and forth rapidly, scrambling to keep the ball in play against a much stronger opponent. On level 4 it was almost more Ping Pong than Tennis and I consider that a feature. When you take the game on its terms and allow yourself to just play, Tennis manages to capture all of the intensity of actual matches surprisingly well despite, or in part because of, its simplicity. It’s just you, your opponent, and the ball. Oh, and Mario. Mario is there. Mario is always there.

    So is this as good as Mario Tennis, a game that came out over a decade later? Hahahaha, no! God no! That said, the more I played Tennis the more I came to enjoy it. Sure the movement is stiff, but the ball control and sheer speed is enough to make me appreciate it on its own merits. Turns out this “Nintendo” company actually can make a sports game! You love to see it, and I don’t mean the tennis score definition.

    3/5

  • Mario Tennis (2000)

    Mario Tennis (2000)

    Look – I hear you. The Game Boy/GBC had so many excellent RPGs, yet my list thus far has been devoid of any. Don’t worry! I got you! First RPG down, and it’s one of the best on the system. Classic single party member ala Dragon Quest I, even! Just a bit of an unconventional battle system is all.

    My history with Mario Tennis is involved but not especially complex. I played the 64 version to death, always heard this was great, and never tried it until now. Every MT entry after the year 2000 was worse. Shame, that. Camelot, on the other hand, I have plenty of experience with, and I don’t just mean their iffier sports entries. Consider how confident they had to be to make both versions of Mario Tennis only to barely feature any Nintendo properties in one of them! That confidence is earned. Oh my god did they earn it.

    As an aside, one of my weaknesses as a reviewer is that I’m better at taking things apart than building them up. It’s easier to praise a game when you have criticisms to use as a springboard, you know? This review will likely be a bit weaker written than some of my others for this project because, spoilers, I barely have anything negative to contrast the positives with. The best I can do is note that I don’t like the font choices, or more specifically the shadows behind them, on a tiny Game Boy screen. I also find myself missing the ridiculously crunchy serve sounds from the 64 version; I swear hitting a Nice! serve in that sounds like a horse chomping into an apple. The Game Boy can’t really do that! These things don’t matter much, not really. The closest thing to a genuine issue is how the game handles leveling/stats, but I’ll talk about that later.

    This game has some of the best spritework on the entire GBC. The sprites would have been top notch on the Neo Geo Pocket Color, but they’re here! On the god damned Game Boy! Every player sprite is incredibly expressive, chock full of characterful details, to the point where they’re entertaining just to see in motion. Combine that with the smooth scrolling of the court in play and little to none of the fake 3D depth issues thanks to the immaculate spriting and lack of slowdown, and you’ve got genuinely excellent handheld tennis.

    Any game with Motoi Sakuraba music is going to be a joy for the ears and this is no exception. So many quality jams. This version’s rendition of Break Point is simpler but still gives me chills, especially when the rally goes long. Rare is the game that gives you your own boss music, but Camelot was operating on an entirely different level. Music that makes you want to black out and spike the ball directly into a child’s schnoz. Powerful stuff.

    God this game’s tennis plays so well, too. Almost everything I internalized from years of the 64 game was immediately transferable. You can steal so many points with an angled serve, drop shot, and crosscourt shot combo. Admittedly that’s true in real life too! What surprised me most in the gameplay itself isn’t its quality, it’s how different the opponents manage to feel. They nearly feel adaptive, even though I know that’s likely not the case. The way they shift to an easier center serve after hitting a fault or start running to the baseline more after getting schooled at the net feels more convincingly Tennis-y than some sim games I’ve played.

    The RPG elements are light but certainly felt. Speed ends up being the key stat because you always need to cover the court, but you will need another specialty to close out the tournament arc. Each level lets you boost one of the four areas of your game, but they often come at the expense of others, leading to some awkward break points where you’ll be more interested in what does the least harm VS boosting what you actually want. It’s not perfect, but it is interesting and forces you to adapt to your weaknesses rather than grind them all to dust. Levels don’t come the quickest from just playing matches, so after a few wins in the junior league I entered the Hyperballic Tennis Chamber that is the training building and climbed some double digit # of levels by whacking the ball into a wall 200 times. I made my PC a speed demon with a downright devious net game and my doubles partner became a nuclear gorilla who could barely move, but could plant the ball anywhere on the court at Mach 3. Not that I played much for doubles, mind. I will generally avoid having 3/4 of the game’s participants be bots if I can help it.

    In terms of escalation it goes intro, team rank/promotion arc, tournament arc, and The Post-Credits Introduction and Subsequent Destruction of Super Freakin’ Mario. Despite characters being chatty and full of personality there really isn’t much plot to speak of. I’m fine with that, to be clear! I suspect I wouldn’t be a huge fan of there being even more talking between matches. Some folks have complained about said matches being too long, which is a funny way to say you just don’t like Tennis. I do, which means I want to play the titular sport, and Camelot understood that they couldn’t have both words in the title be disingenuous.

    I do kinda love the Mario Section though. Spoilers? I guess? Do we really care? Have a courtesy warning, but I will think a smidge less of you if this is a legitimate cutoff.

    After the award ceremony ends and credits roll you find yourself back at the academy standing in the headmaster’s office. Out of absolutely nowhere he informs you of the following facts:

    • Mario exists in this setting. He has been offscreen, watching from the shadows the entire time.
    • Mario is the single greatest tennis player to ever do it.
    • Mario has taken an interest in you specifically, because your defenses are impregnable and your style is impetuous.
    • You must take a flight to Peach’s Castle immediately. The headmaster will not take No for an answer. I tried.

    Once you arrive it immediately becomes clear that you’re out of your depth. There is some kind of political situation going on, and I don’t mean the kind where the video game has women in it. The room has been split into factions, good and evil specifically, and the latter is absolutely intent on having your character play and defeat Mario on the court upon arrival as they haven’t managed to. Bizarrely, the imperial side informs the villains that Mario actually just invited your character there to chill post-tournament, which…isn’t true? As far as we know? This is clearly an attempt at deescalation, truth be damned.

    Anyway. The brothers Wa and Bowser insist that you do battle on their behalf. I accepted, of course, because I know where my loywalties lie. Mario was destroyed in straight sets and it wasn’t particularly close. The game ends abruptly afterwards, presumably due to committing the equivalent of a tennis-themed Franz Ferdinand assassination. My love of the game transcends my general aversion to causing international incidents. Obey Wario. Destroy Mario.

    4.5/5